Scourge intel: Why they are so powerful

The Qing
The Qing
Unicorn Overlord
Joined Dec 2013 Posts: 2,545

[transmission start]
[encrypt key:926471]

To all Forsaken allies,

The Scourge moves on our strongholds with an unmatched pace. Though they have not been at the surface for eternity, they have somehow refitted all their hulls with uber-unreactive and increased missle resistance, rendering the harrier missle and antipode launcher useless.

As expected, my own fleets sunk within a minute of entering combat.

However, we have managed to retrieve a body of a dead Scourge crew member. Apart from the unusual ritual scars and other adaptations expected of a deep-sea dweller, autopsy shows a complete obliteration of the **** of the Scourge member, including disgusting infections and fungal growths.

This damage is horrifying to see. Previously, autopsies of Reaver crew showed only somewhat severe damage to their rectums.

Our conclusion: the Scourge must have offered full unrestricted access to their arseholes to Kixeye the Almighty. This explains the unholy power that their ships have been granted, which makes even the Reavers fear them.

I and the crew will cower in our outpost for the remainder of this Ascension. Hopefully we go unnoticed by this enemy. When Kixeye the Almighty gives his full blessing to them, we can only cower in fear.

[transmission end]

Playing this game is like trying to row a boat up a waterfall.
  • Bloody Bill
    Bloody Bill
    Minor Nuisance
    Joined Oct 2014 Posts: 244

    That is funny.

    The irony here is overwhelming.
  • The Qing
    The Qing
    Unicorn Overlord
    Joined Dec 2013 Posts: 2,545

    Glad you think that way :smile: Dunno why kix moved it to fan creations

    Playing this game is like trying to row a boat up a waterfall.
    Minor Nuisance
    Joined Jan 2014 Posts: 114

  • Sea_Wolf334
    Potential Threat
    Joined May 2012 Posts: 38
  • Dazandren
    Incursion Leader
    Joined Mar 2013 Posts: 1,456
    i love it!!  hilarious  lolol :D
  • rtomera1
    Joined Jul 2012 Posts: 16
    theres no bread let them eat cake lmao 

  • machine-R-us
    Incursion Leader
    Joined Apr 2013 Posts: 1,489
    lmao i love this
    imagecoop is a must in this game to make lower lvls better because with out coop this game will die and the stupid trolls and idiots dont care about low lvls 
  • StingUSA
    Potential Threat
    Joined Jul 2012 Posts: 72
    I figured it had to be a bribe of some kind...
  • Grathakar
    Incursion Leader
    Joined Feb 2012 Posts: 1,162
    TOO Funny!

  • leonvdburgh
    Strike-force Captain
    Joined Oct 2013 Posts: 648
    Again the same powerful fleets
  • DeathStorm13
    Incursion Leader
    Joined Aug 2014 Posts: 1,025
    Well can i get the Kixeye power treatment next lol ?  I want OP ships and weapons that nobody can get .....
    Normal work day at Kixeye . I had Jail Bars Twice does that make me an Double Badass ?

Sign In or Register to comment.